


stay with me (before sunrise)

by berrybliss



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: :"D, Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe, Ex-model!Akashi, KNBSS2k17, Kuroko no Basuke Secret Santa 2017, M/M, Photographer!Nijimura, if only it were as good as the tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-20 02:56:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13137633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/berrybliss/pseuds/berrybliss
Summary: Nijimura and Akashi navigate through the tempest that they have created around themselves, reuniting after four years.





	stay with me (before sunrise)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TokiKurp](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TokiKurp/gifts).



> //pops out from nijiaka hell  
> MERRY CHRISTMAS KNB FANDOM!!  
> Remember how last time, my theme song for smut was Pirates of the Caribbean? Now it’s Show me How You Burlesque by Christina Aguilera lol  
> This fic… did not go in the direction I thought it would, and I think that’s a good thing. To Brooke, my secret santa recipient, I wanted so much to make another fic in case you didn’t like this one, and give you the rakuzan you deserve, but nothing was clicking. This is very different from my other fics, but it’s a story I wanted to write. Writing it was dangerous ground when I could have stuck with fluff. I know how much you love NijiAka, and I’m sorry I can’t do them justice :( Still, Merry Christmas!

It’s easy to see _him_ among the white walls of Gallery 916, though of all places and of all times, Nijimura does not expect him to be there at all. The red bleeds into the white walls, and Nijimura remembers many things upon seeing it, many memories he’d never thought would resurface ever again.

Because when he remembers Akashi Seijuro, it’s always a blur. He doesn’t delve into specific memories – he remembers the collective experience instead – the bigger picture - and the ways that Akashi Seijuro moved him in more ways than one, pushed him to become what he is today.

The walls would be colorful when filled with their memories - and yet, the white is gratifyingly appropriate. It is representative of what they were left with – what they _are_ left with, another blank page.

_That’s what this is._

(Red for desire.)

“I didn’t expect to see you here, Shuzo.”

There’s a brief pause before saying his name. _Took the words out of my mouth._ He gives Akashi a small smile. “A lot of people don’t know this place, but huh, knowing you…”

“Yes,” Akashi murmurs thoughtfully, looking back to the picture he’d been looking at. It is a provocative picture, though not in the sense one might think. A hand with a ring is displayed delicately over an exposed shoulder, the photo itself in monochrome. Long locks of hair cascade down the side, and the profile of a well-defined chin can be seen, that of the ring’s owner.

“You have quite an intriguing portfolio.”

“Is that what you’ve been up to these days? Looking at photos?”

 “They serve as inspiration. Business can paint quite a mundane picture over time.” Akashi shoots an amused smirk his way, “Don’t they make you feel a certain way too?”

There are pieces of himself in those photos. Knowing Akashi, he must have seen them at some point. Maybe he’s even come to see them multiple times, and the thought alone is enough to reduce Nijimura to being at a loss for words.

Still, the way Akashi knows yet still asks - it rubs him the wrong way,

“Of course they do.” He frowns, because Akashi’s all too aware of the answer. “Want to go grab some coffee? If you have time, of course.”

They used to do this a lot, in their free time. While it’s all in the past, it doesn’t seem too far off to what they’d do if they were still together. Akashi doesn’t seem to have any objections, because he nods, and they walk out of Gallery 916 together.

And when they part that day, Nijimura wants to capture the silhouette of his back in frame, if only because he doesn’t feel like the years have changed anything, including what he feels.

And Akashi is still very far away, even then.

* * *

 

It had all started with an accidental gig, though if anything, it was more happenstance for Nijimura and more accident for Akashi.

He had been a photographer working up through the ranks, still working for the model industry at the time. The model he was supposed work with was dealing with a family emergency, and much to his surprise, the one who entered through the studio’s glass doors was a breathtakingly attractive male with heterochromatic eyes. He'd been a fresh model, a recruit recommended by Mibuchi Reo, and many people on the shoot had been cynical that he'd meet expectations at all. Modelling needed more than just a pretty face. Akashi Seijuro was undoubtedly otherworldly, and the agency had their own idea of how important the shoot would be. 

Needless to say, Akashi defied all expectations. Nijimura was transfixed. Everyone was, in awe of the wonders that Akashi produced.

Akashi had been friends with the model – still is. By association, Nijimura is Reo’s friend as well, because Reo has been nothing but supportive post-break-up.

It had been by accident, yes, but that was how he and Akashi Seijuro met. After those photos went viral and took the modeling industry by storm, he and Akashi delved into territory that would be considered more than professional. They’d gone to all sorts of places together, and Akashi only ever modeled for Nijimura. Many photographers and agencies would say that it is a shame. Nijimura agrees, but Akashi is persistent.

Because looking back at it now, there hadn’t been anything wrong with him and Akashi, except that Akashi had priorities, and at the time they broke up, Nijimura simply wasn’t one of them anymore.

But Nijimura is content with having looked at Akashi through the lens. It is intimate in its own way, for Akashi to have allowed him to keep all those things.

* * *

_“What were you doing in the gallery?”_

_“I frequent it. It’s more private than other galleries.” Is the clipped reply, though Akashi continues by adding, “If you think I initially went there to see your collection, you are mistaken, although… you would be right in thinking that I find myself going back because of them, among all other things.”_

_“How flattering,” Nijimura rolls his eyes, snorting into his cup._

_“What do you make of this encounter, Shuzo?”_

_Akashi’s eyes are expectant. Nijimura has seen this look on Akashi before, albeit very seldom. For a moment, he even sees hope._

_“I don’t know… I mean, I’m happy, but also, I’m not sure if you are happy. About this.” He gestures to how they are, seated opposite to each other, not quite perfect strangers, yet with a definite bridge in between that has yet to be crossed._

_“We can put the past behind us, if that’s what it means to get us back to where we began.”_

_Nijimura smiles without knowing it._

_“That sounds like a good idea.”_

* * *

 

It’s a simple message that comes on an idle Saturday morning, something that he cannot ignore. Not that he ever had any intention to ignore Akashi.

_From: Akashi_

_Subject: -_

_Text: Are you free for tonight?_

And when he sends his confirmation that yes, he is free for that night, Akashi’s reply comes at an almost snail paced rate, though it’s probably because Nijimura’s hands are subconsciously shaking from the waiting.

_From: Akashi_

_Subject: -_

_Text: I was wondering if you could accompany me for dinner. Would you be willing?_

And the thing is, most of his messages for Akashi are one-worded responses, unless he really has something in mind, something that can’t wait. He’s patient by virtue though, when it comes to Akashi, and Akashi had valued that.

And he himself doesn’t stop valuing the little things either, like how Akashi always makes an effort to ask for his approval, when he could just send a short, withdrawn message like he does to everyone else.

But it’s been a long while. Besides, he can’t think of actually replying with one-worded responses anymore. They’re way past that state of comfortability, and between the lines, a lot is actually said.

_To: Akashi_

_Subject: Sure_

_Text: Where do we meet?_

…

The reply is faster this time.

_From: Akashi_

_Subject: -_

_Text: A car will come pick you up at 6 PM. We’ll be having dinner at The Ritz-Carlton. I might be running late, however, so feel free to do whatever you’d like before then._

He doesn’t even ask how Akashi knows with confident that his address hasn’t changed. It actually hasn’t, but that’s beside the point.  

What comes to most attention isn’t even the specifics, but the last line of Akashi’s reply.

_I already booked a room, so you are free to do as you like with that as well. The room number is 506._

_I apologize for this._

Tangled sheets and warm bodies - it’s all part of the blur he remembers, the collective experience of what once was. He can’t help but miss it, and while it sounds awfully sentimental, it’s mostly because he will never meet anyone like Akashi again.

It’s a flaw of Nijimura’s, to be so easily attached to things that are unreachable, yet to be so engrossed in thinking of the reasons behind everything that can go wrong.

_To: Akashi_

_Subject: Idiot_

_Text: Why are you apologizing? :P It’s fine._

_See you later. Got some stuff to take care of first._

He wonders if second chances really do exist, even if the sensible part of him says that Akashi might not even be thinking about that at all. Maybe this Akashi just wants a good time, and isn’t dwelling in the past anymore. They’d agreed to stay friends, even though the years that followed had barely any contact or exchange between them at all, save for a few gifts sent through parcel.

_“This is Akashi Seijuro. Mibuchi Reo sent him to come in his place.”_

And maybe that had been the strange part about it. Akashi plans out his own life, but when it comes to Nijimura, it’s all about letting things happen, about spontaneity. It’s no surprise that their next meeting would be a spontaneous one, occurring at the spur of the moment.

He walks out of his room, away from the editing software he’d been using to sort out his photos. Going down the stairs, he sees his mother, who asks after him with a warm smile on her face.

“Is something wrong?” She asks, concerned, “You don’t look like you got enough sleep.”

“Do I? It’s nothing though - really.” He has to stress this, because his mother looks worried. “I came down to tell you that I’m going to the grocery store later, so I might be able to pick up Ryou along the way.”

“Why the sudden change of plans? There must be some reason.”

“I might be gone for the entire night, so I thought it was only fair…”

“The entire night?! Nijimura Shuzo,” His mom holds her arms to her hips, and it’s strange, because the last time she did that to him, she’d been taller, “You aren’t doing anything behind my back, are you? You’re not in that phase anymore.”

Being reminded of his little delinquent phase makes him flinch.“No, I… I’m meeting with someone, actually.” He says slowly, “I encountered Akashi again recently, and he invited me out to dinner.”

He watches his mother’s reaction to this. She looks down thoughtfully, before meeting his eyes.

“He really did?”

“Yes. And he told me he’s booked a room so…”

“We’ve talked about this,” Her smile doesn’t falter, despite the fact that she knows about what happened between him and Akashi. She seems to be understanding about the whole thing. It makes Nijimura breathe in relief.

“I trust you. Now, go get something for Akashi-kun too. The last thing you want to do is come off as impolite.”

* * *

 

In the end, after having a mouthful of dishes with foreign-sounding names, he ends up using the elevator to get to the suite that Akashi said was his to use. Before that, he’d made sure to buy some stuff for his mother and younger siblings with his own money. He’d also made sure to send his mother pictures, as promised – some were of the food, and some were of the hotel ambience in general. He got a message telling him to take his time, and to “enjoy it while it lasts”.

Just as he takes off his socks, his feet on the soft fabric of the mat, Akashi texts him.

_I’m here now. I brought back some of your favorite fried rice._

And out of a weird impulse, Nijimura replies with _That’s great. I’m about to take a shower right now._ _Thanks for this by the way._

And before Nijimura reaches the bathroom door, Akashi is already there, plastic bags in his hand. It’s a great contrast to the rest of his outfit, the picture perfect definition of formality.

“Hello, Shuzo. I do apologize for the delay.”

“You didn’t have to hurry for me, you know. You could have taken your time.”

“Oh?” Akashi glances at him with the corner of his eye, after setting the bags down on the desk. “From your text message, I wouldn’t deduce that at all.”

An awkward silence stretches. Nijimura decides to break it, for the sake of his ears which are tinged red too.

“Is that a yes?”

“To your suggestion, yes. I wouldn’t mind.”

In their times together, Nijimura has never heard Akashi use the word ‘want’. It is always ‘I would like that’ or ‘I would prefer that’ with him. Akashi takes off his blazer, pulling at his necktie with half-lidded eyes.

“It is redundant if we do it after the shower, however.”

“That’s what you’re worried about?” Nijimura laughs, not even bothering to deny the undertones of his suggestive text message, which Akashi has so cleverly picked up on, “It’s… been a while since I –“ He corrects himself, “Since we last did this.”

Akashi takes off his pants, and leaves them on the spacious bed.  

“Surprise me, then.”

Nijimura starts taking off his own clothes too, till they’re both stark naked in the bathroom. Akashi has always been toned for a _bocchan_ – perhaps it is because he used to play basketball. It’s a great contrast to the long-limbed grace he has been fortuned with.

They agree on one of them taking the shower and one taking the bathtub. Nijimura has always preferred the shower, while Akashi always seem to prefer taking the shower if it’s them together, and not him by himself.

Akashi knocks on the wet glass. Nijimura almost doesn’t hear it over the running water. He opens the door, and Akashi joins him in the shower area, one feet in with toes pressing delicately on a small puddle of water, like a ripple on a pond.

Akashi’s hand trails towards his cheek. It is warm. They have always been different. Akashi likes to scald himself in hot water, engulfed in steam like smoke. It barely shows in the red of his shoulders, though the rest of his pallor is normal.

Akashi whispers, his crimson gaze arresting. “Don’t ever hold back with me, Shuzo. You know I hate that.”

Nijimura has never been one to burn easily.

“Yeah, I do.”

He craves the touch of Akashi’s warmth. He leans into it, and swoops down for Akashi’s lips, which let out a pleasurable noise upon contact, their tongues meshing together as Nijimura pushes Akashi to a wall. Akashi’s hand grips Nijimura’s hair, urging him to go deeper.

Nijimura’s hands fix onto Akashi’s hips. They pull away from each other, and Nijimura utters his name.

“Akashi…”

Akashi kisses his shoulder blade, and moves down to bite his nipple. Nijimura’s teeth clench, his arms finding their way above Akashi’s head, unable to prevent the blush creeping into his cheeks with the sensation of Akashi’s tongue on his wet skin.

It is in moments like that, when they are alone, and when Akashi gives himself to him, that Nijimura is absolutely floored. He closes his eyes, taking slow, deep breaths as Akashi has him curled around his fingertips.

And he likes the little ways Akashi plays with him, because Akashi knows what he wants, and Akashi knows that he’s in control. Nijimura likes giving Akashi control – it’s what had defined their dynamic in the first place.           

He bites into a patch of bare skin on Akashi’s nape. Akashi groans into his chest, their torsos sliding against each other, beads of water trickling down Akashi’s hair and dribbling onto his own nape as his back is arched, now facing the showerhead. Inhaling the scent, it smells vaguely of lavender. He and Akashi were in a flower field, once, when they went to visit the countryside for peace and quiet. He still has the picture, still remembers the earnest wish behind that little trip.

…

_“I like being alone with you.”_

_…_

 His fingers had curled into Akashi’s, and he had hoped that that moment in time would be framed forever.

Akashi litters kisses all over his torso. Almost as if by instinct, his cock goes hard once Akashi kneels, and touches it – taking it into his mouth, exploring its length. It is unfair, for him to think that Akashi is beautiful doing that, too.

In everything that he does. In whatever he says, in however he chooses to move.

Nijimura is unable to hold the coming orgasm, as cum drips down Akashi’s chin.

Akashi’s eyes dart towards Nijimura as he opens his mouth, wiping with the back of his hand. The running water encloses them in that space, and they appear to be in their own little world.

After all, Nijimura worships Akashi, even when he is on his knees. Nijimura helps him up, and as if dictating from experience, Akashi turns around, back facing Nijimura.

Akashi blooms under Nijimura’s careful touch as he scissors his way into his opening. He holds onto the metal ledge, shuddering as Nijimura’s other hand gropes his buttcheek. Nijimura presses his lips against Akashi’s, muffling his moans. He caresses the back of Akashi’s thigh, then, as Akashi’s breath mists up the glass wall.

He raises his head, eyes glazed. _“Shuzo.”_

 Slowly, he removes his fingers one by one, taxingly slow, drawing satisfaction from the small whine Akashi tries to suppress.

“Say the words, Akashi.”

Small breaths come out in huffs. “I need you, Shuzo.”

“Ask for it and you shall have it.” Nijimura whispers huskily, positioning himself. He thrusts himself in, his length going through Akashi’s tight ass. It happens to hit a sweet spot, because Akashi’s head drops and his breathing becomes erratic, as he takes Nijimura in.

 “Does it feel good?”

Akashi groans. “Yes. Yes, it does. Don’t stop.”  

“We’ll have to, you know,” Nijimura can’t help but chuckle light-heartedly, despite the position they’re in, despite how he’s in the midst of thrusting into Akashi, “Eventually.”

“Eventually,” Akashi repeats, licking his lips when Nijimura’s member twists inside of him. Unmistakably, a surge of warmth overcomes Akashi as semen drips down his thighs. “Oh, _Nijimura-san-”_

Nijimura, amidst the pleasure, is snapped out of his reverie, finding himself blushing even harder. He knows it’s a move done by Akashi on purpose. Akashi knows how weak he is to the _Nijimura-san_ thing. It doesn’t help that it’s so kinky when Akashi says it.

“You’re so tight, Akashi. You love it when I talk to you like this, don’t you?”         

“I like it when you talk.” Akashi struggles to get the words out, his hips moving slightly. “I always have.”

And as they help each other wash off later on, Akashi sneaks a bit of kisses in between, telling Nijimura that next time, he will have the satisfaction doing the talking.

“Yeah, yeah, you’re the talk master, I get it.”

Akashi slaps Nijimura playfully on the shoulder. They laugh in sync, their bodies both soaked, their smiles reaching their eyes, for once.

Nijimura helps Akashi dry his hair. They do it for each other, and as Akashi’s hands deftly ruffle strands of his wet hair, Nijimura enters an almost dreamlike state, because this is the good life, he decides. Akashi doesn’t seem to notice him look at the mirror, concentrated on his task. A comfortable silence settles between them. Akashi is the one who decides to break it.

“I missed this, Shuzo.”

Nijimura purses his lips. “We could still have it, you know. I’m willing to wait.”

“I had you wait long enough. Your patience is admirable.”

He doesn’t know if it’s because it’s hard to rise above the noise, but Akashi’s voice seems to become softer at this point.

“I owe you an apology.”

The blow-dryer isn’t on anymore, the warm air put to a halt. Akashi sets it down.

Nijimura runs a hand through his hair, turning around as Akashi moves to sit on the bed. Akashi pats the space beside him, urging Nijimura to sit by his side.

Nijimura gets the fried rice from the takeout bag and starts to eat.

“If this is going to be a long talk,” He swallows, smiling, “We might as well get comfortable while we’re at it.”

“I suppose.” Akashi muses, though he seems right at home with his head rested on the pillows. For a moment, he looks genuinely relaxed, but he reverts back to little shit mode again, as he says, “Don’t you want to be even more comfortable?”

 “That depends on what you have to say for yourself.” And truth be told, he has a lot of things he needs to tell Akashi too.

Akashi sits up, grabbing one of the spare pillows. He holds onto it.

“I don’t deserve you. Not this.”

“What gave you that idea?”

“Well,” Akashi breaks eye contact. “I could have tried harder for us to happen. Instead of holding up to our promise, I kept everything to myself. I knew how much you wanted this, and yet I was too weak to keep it together either way.”

The promise that they would do everything together, and that if they had any troubles, they’d rely on each other too.

Akashi pauses. “Nothing will bring back the years we lost. I know that. Perhaps I am taking my chances, but regardless of this, I am willing to atone, if it is for you. My life right now isn’t as chaotic as it used to be, yet it is… different without you there.”

“That’s…” Nijimura takes a deep breath. He gets the feeling very well. He watches Akashi’s expression, guarded, but going down a layer, one could see worry, uneasiness. Decisively, he wants to break the tension, because it must have been hard for the both of them.

“I guess it’s about time we talked about that. Just so you know, I’m all in if you want a relationship again.”

Akashi closes his eyes. “I want this decision to be of your own volition. Do you want this for yourself, Shuzo?”

It’s the first time the word ‘want’ falls out of Akashi’s lips.

 “Of course I do. I want you to hear my side of things too though.”

“By all means, then.”

And looking back, Nijimura doesn’t know where to begin.

“When I first saw you in that gallery, the first thing I noticed was that you didn’t have a ring on your finger yet. You somehow leave out on those details every time you send me letters for Christmas, or my birthday. Then I thought, ‘oh wow, what a coincidence. And he’s still pretty. Damn.’ “

Akashi’s eyes light up.

Nijimura holds out a spoon of fried rice. “No, don’t interrupt.”

Akashi rolls his eyes and eats the fried rice on the spoon.

“So anyway, seeing you kinda reminded me of what I lost. We were both functioning okay without each other, but that’s what we’ve been doing our entire lives. Trying to function for others.”

“… The only thing that helped was that I knew how, maybe, it wasn’t the right time for us yet. We never blamed each other, you know? There was no room for that. It just happened. I knew you needed space, even if I wasn’t offered much explanation, so I let you go. That doesn’t change how a part of me hoped that you would come back. I lost hope over the years. Going from that to friends stung, but most of all, it hurt because I knew that you weren’t content with that either. _I_ wasn’t, no matter how much I lied to myself.”

“You’ve been very clear in saying how you want this again, and if you think that now’s the right time, I couldn’t be happier than I am now.”

“That’s my side of things.”

He kisses Akashi on the forehead. “Once a sap?“

“Always a sap.”

They hold hands. Akashi’s hands are cold against his. Nijimura cradles the fried rice with his legs, and finishes what’s left of it before lying down with Akashi.

“I appreciate it, Shuzo. I really do.”

He had been in a dark place before he met Nijimura Shuzo.

“What do you want to do now?” Nijimura asks him.

And Nijimura can deny it all he can, but he has always put Akashi in a pedestal, so much that he forgets himself. Akashi doesn’t want that. Always, every step of the way, it has been to become closer to Nijimura. To walk alongside him, to have him by his side.

“This is fine.”

_This is fine._

When Nijimura wakes up, Akashi’s hand is still entwined with his, and it comforts him to know that after the sun has risen, Akashi is there to stay.            


End file.
